Okay, real talk today.
So I’m famous now! My debut as a podcast guest has aired here. It’s about… Periods! I never thought I’d be interviewed about that. Ha. It’s quite timely, though, because this week has been a hell of PMS.
My friend Whitney, who recorded the podcast, added in a section after our interview about PMDD. I didn’t even really know what that was until she mentioned it, but once I looked it up, I was like– Whoa that’s me. As I mention in the the episode, my PMS strikes hard. This is when depression and hopelessness and general lack of perspective really rule my brain. It’s also when it’s the very hardest to put my running shoes on.
I didn’t stick as arduously to my routine this week. I’m gonna give myself something of a pass (because my other MO is to beat myself up about it, and none of us need that). But I am going to look at where and why I skipped some stuff, how my workouts went, and what I want to do better. Accountability!
On Saturday the 25th (technically last week, but I did my training log early last week), I did a 4 mile run. It was slow and stedy but I kicked its butt. That was at a cabin in Wisconsin some friends and I visited. I ran among the fields. It was awesome to be out of the city, even if farms feel pretty city-ish to this Alaskan.
I will admit on this 4 miler I was a bit hungover. The friends and I enjoyed a lovely friday night involving a lot of wine and board games, and, probably unwisely, a big bonfire. This was the first time I managed to get a hangover for about a decade. Good times. However, I’ve always found that exercise really does help me sweat things out. Headache and nausea aside, I tied up my shoes and took em out for a stroll. It was slow but good for me. I felt better after. Make note!
I also threw in a quick boxing workout when I got back, doing some jumprope and the weight routine I learned at Mark’s Boxing Gym.
I did a 3 mile run with the dogs the next day, just cuz, and that felt great. We also went for a little hike at Taylor’s Falls on the way back home, which was more excercise in the form of resisting Ophelia (who has become giant and very strong) yanking me around everywhere.
The Monday after I got back ended up being much busier than expected. I did my scheduled 3 mile run at a good pace, but didn’t get in my 30 min of boxing. I hoped to push that to Tuesday but then the avalanche of waiting til tomorrow began.
Tuesday I did go for another run with with dogs. Ophelia especially is getting more and more ansty as she grows into her dog body and wants to do the one thing thousands of years of evolution and breeding have selected for her to do: RUN!!! However, she is also really really strong now. Up to this point it has been okay for me to run with the two dogs. I used to run with Hooch alone frequently, back in the day. With her and Ophelia it was obviously a little tougher, but it was working pretty well. I use a skijour belt to distribute the pulling against my body. My running style is drastically different from regular running. It’s like running down a very very steep hill. You have to throw all of your weight backwards.
The dogs are at a point now where I cannot keep excellent control of them when I have them both on leash! When I am walking them, there are times where if they both decide to throw their weight against me, they will drag me where they want to go. This bodes well for my future sled dog team! But it is difficult for walks, and now, it is really really hard on my legs during runs.
On Wednesday, I didn’t run, partially because I felt crummy mentally, partially because I’d done an “extra” run Tuesday (even though it was with the dogs!), partially because my legs were starting to hurt. I played basketball but wasn’t at my peak. I could really feel my legs. It felt like I was getting shin splints again, which I haven’t had since high school. I am sure this is due to the situation with the dogs.
Thursday, I had a real battle with myself. I did NOT want to run. I knew I had to to make up for missing a run Wednesday, but I was fighting it. Ophelia was also extra extra pesky. She needed a workout bad. Finally, I compromised with myself and took just Ophelia on a run. This was easier to manage, but she still pulls harder than Hooch. Hooch has learned over many years to keep up a steady trot. Ophelia just wants to GO. So even though it was just her, it was still pretty high impact. Another note– I live right in the city, so I’m running completely on pavement. There are some places I could drive to to get to more trail based running, but my option here is pretty much sidewalk or pavement.
I did do a good boxing workout Thursday night. I have been doing a lot better at pushing myself in boxing. I hold myself to the same standard as I hold my friends who are working out with me. I feel good about what I’ve been doing with that.
Friday I did a short (2.5) mile run with my person-friend, Shawn. They run at a slower pace than I normally do, which was excellent for me. My legs were still really bothering me. Doing a short and slow run warmed them up and actually made them feel a lot better.
Saturday I was supposed to do a run. Did I? No. I had a lot of social things, but the truth is, I just put it off. Sunday, same story. In my defense, I did start getting really sick on Sunday– I caught a plague that’s going around. But is that a real excuse? No way. I have done things way effing tougher than go on a run when I’ve been sick. So that’s a pretty lame cop out.
Here’s advice: don’t put things off!!! Once you do, it starts a cascade. I know, because I do this all the time. This week was a perfect example. At first, I kept pushing workouts to the next day, and then I gave myself a pass on one workout and it gave me permission to not do any workouts. This, coupled with my impending PMS, was really tough to fight.
As I mark this stuff down, I see the run I really missed was my big weekend run. I have definitely been feeling a lot of guilt about that. It’s a really tricky balance between accountability and shame. I need to work on being accountable but not flogging myself with guilt. It’s not really useful.
The weekend was also stressful because Hooch got an infected anal gland. This had to be lanced by the vet ($$$). I felt like I should have caught this earlier (I should have), and it also made me worry a lot about money. Moving down here and being in the city has been really hard financially. Those who know me know I am not the most sensible about money. I got into a pretty good guilt spiral about that yesterday… And I also realized that I am PMSing really hard, and tend to beat myself up for things and lose hope about things. Yesterday when I was going through that, I made the choice to NOT make any big choices. That took some of the pressure off. When I get in that zone, I tend to think I need to make all the big life choices RIGHT THEN to solve the pain. But without perspective I tend to make unreasonable choices which can come back to bite me in the butt.
So that was my week in training. It’s good to see I did keep hitting the pavement. Today I am slated to go for a run. I have already put it off– but I made an agreement with myself that I will do it this afternoon. It’s sunny and clear out, and even fairly warm, so I should take my lunch break soon and hit the road.
Resetting the clock for this week!
(PS if you dig this… eg if you were one of the intrepid few who made it this far in this novel… click here and like my Facebook page. I’ll be posting pics and– I promise– shorter updates about my training!)